Quick exit
Do you use any of the following behaviours (either alone or combined) in your family or intimate relationships?
- Any form of physical violence, intimidation or assault – including unwanted sexual activity
- Emotional and psychological means to control another person’s behaviour – name-calling, belittling, continuous criticism or exclusion
- Threaten and put pressure on another person – for example, threatening to leave, to harm yourself, or not support the family
- Restrict another’s behaviour. Examples: Going everywhere with them, questioning what they have been doing, stopping them from contacting family or friends, isolating them from support, dictating what they can or cannot do
- Exhibit negative behaviour when faced with stress in your life, including family disagreements, or when you have been drinking or using drugs
- Justify your violent and abusive behaviour by saying or feeling any of the following:
- "I wasn't being abusive." This may indicate denial.
- "I only pushed them, they weren't hurt." This may indicate minimising impact.
- "If they stopped annoying me, I wouldn't have had to do it." This may indicate justification.
- "It's not my fault," or "I'm under a lot of pressure at the moment." This may indicate blaming others.
- "I didn't know what I was doing," or "I was drunk." This may indicate deflecting responsibility.
- "I don't know why I hit them." This may indicate avoidance.
If you identify with any of the above, you have taken the first step. It is now time to take responsibility for your actions and control your behaviour. Help and support is available for you and your family. Reach out for support.